Everett's realization of the new year

The New Year didn't start off well for Ev. We keep a calendar in the bathroom to remind us of the date and things we need to do for the day. Everett kept looking at calendar & became upset. He noticed the year had changed and it really upset him. He's realized that he has lost a lot of time and doesn't know where the time went!

I tried to explain to him that he had an accident & that he had been in a coma and spent 4 months in the Hospital. I could see him thinking & becoming more upset at me and the world. Where had the time gone and why can't he remember anything! He points to himself because he is in his wheelchair, and touches his head because it hurts and their are fragments of bone that is missing in his skull. 

"Why?" he asks. "Why. What happened?" I go through the pain of having to explain the entire ordeal as it plays out in head. That day will never be erased from my mind. It's as if it happened yesterday & Keep praying that we wake from this horrific nightmare and life will go back to the way it was.

Having a traumatic brain injury is like a personal death to ones self. You find yourself not having any control over any situation. Ev is going through different stages of anger like a person would after losing a loved one to death. He is in mourning. He mourns for his life and memory back.

I can understand what he's going through, and I can't imagine going through the pain he goes through on a daily basis. He remembers us by images that pop into his head, he doesn't always remember who we are by name but he knows our faces, I take comfort that he knows me, but saddens when me when he asks who I am